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According To Astrology, Here Is What You Should Buy Your Mom

May 06, 2018 1 Comment

mother's day on yellow background

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If you're having a tough time figuring out what to give your mom for Mother's day, here is a humorous guide to finding the perfect gift, based on the traits and qualities of her zodiac sign. 


holding bouquet

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If your mom is an Aries, she’s likely pretty energetic and always on the go, which means she probably dragged you to all of her favorite events and activities when you were a kid, whether you wanted to go or not. (Who’s the kid here anyway, said every child of an Aries.) As self-involved as she might be, you’re one of the most important people in her life, so show mom you care with something like…

  • A hard hat
  • Sneakers that light up when you walk
  • Tickets to a game

Best Loose Leaf gifts for these energetic ladies:


mother and child



Taureans are well known for being thrifty (tightwads), caring (overinvolved), and practical (boring). Everyone in House Hufflepuff was a Taurus. The upside of having a Taurus for a mom: she always has $100 to loan you, and she’ll make sandwiches for you and the crew 24/7. They’re also some of the best huggers of the zodiac, which probably did wonders for your self-esteem growing up. For this reason alone, you should get her something awesome, like…

Taurus moms will love these Loose Leaf ideas:



Geminis require novelty, and bore easily. They tend to misplace everything, so don’t spend too much money on something that might end up wedged in the couch. It’s likely that she might even forget it’s Mother’s Day, but in the event she actually remembers (unlike a few of your birthdays) she will want a thoughtful gift, so make it sure it’s interesting, with a good back story. A few thoughtful ideas…

  • A Route 66 road atlas
  • Very chewy artisanal taffy, so she will hopefully stop talking for a few minutes
  • Anything antique and unusual

These bright and energetic Gemini mamas will appreciate these relaxing and grounding herbal goodies:

  • Because Geminis adore variety, a Just Try 5 tea sample pack is a fun way to try new teas without making a commitment to just one (so boring)
  • Anxiety Relief tea (if you’ve spent more than 3 minutes with a Gemini, you will understand why)
  • Gemini mom will be fascinated with the rich indigo-purple color of Lush Lavender tea, which will also settle her nerves


mother and daughter



Cancer mothers will always worry about you, so your best gift to her is getting your act together. If you haven’t done that yet, skip the gift, check yourself into rehab, and send her a postcard from there. That will make her day far more than a new Keurig. (Side note: If your mom is Italian, multiply all Cancerian qualities by 100.) Beyond that, here are a few gift ideas that will let her know that A. you love her and B. you’re FINE. Wow her with something like this:

Loving and sentimental Cancer moms will also appreciate :

  • Joyful Garden tea to uplift her mood and help her feel calm
  • Stomach Soother tea was made for worrywart Cancerian moms with agita, the Italian word for "now look what you've done, my stomach is all upset thanks to you"
  • How about a hug on the inside? Sweet and refreshing Hug In A Mug tea will remind her how much you care with every sip



Loyal Leo moms will appreciate whatever you give to her, because you’re her cub, and can do no wrong ever. You still might be able to get away with drawing her a picture, but what she really wants is a day at the spa. Alone. If that’s out of your budget, she will appreciate…

Big-hearted Leos will also love:


mom and daughter



It’s not that Virgo moms are completely unemotional, they're just nerdier than other zodiac signs. Picture Mr. Spock managing a daycare, a highly illogical scenario, and you will get a glimpse into the inner workings of a Virgo’s mind when it comes to parenting. A huge plus: analytical Virgo mothers can really roll with it once they crack into the childhood operating system interface. She probably spent most of your tender years in a state of chronic constipation, but weren't you the neatest, cleanest, best groomed kid on the block? This deserves some gratitude, don’t you think? Best gifts for Virgos…

Kidding aside, earth sign Virgos will enjoy these:



Libras love beauty. And themselves. The term “mirror face” was coined after observing Libras getting ready. Speaking of getting ready, make reservations way in advance for Mother’s Day brunch, because Libras love dressing up and going out for mimosas, which they can knock back faster than you can say “narcissist”. Seriously though, your Libra mom loves you more than anything, and wants you to be happy and successful (because that makes her look good). Despite her “flawlessness”, she’s pretty awesome, and deserves something special, like…

  • Designer napkin rings
  • A life-size portrait of herself in a gorgeous frame
  • Makeup
  • Diamonds

And because you want her to live a long and healthy life, give her something from this Loose Leaf list:

  • Ginseng Green Dragon tea, for long lasting energy
  • Moroccan Rose Mint tea is a natural beauty enhancer, and contains her fave flower: rose
  • If she is one of those indecisive Libras, a tea sampler box will take the pressure off and allow her to enjoy multiple teas without having to make a decision 


mother and child



Your Scorpio mom (aka “The Sea Witch”) still sees right through you. After all, she read all of your journals (for your own good), and continues to stalk you on Facebook. Why? Because she really loves you (although she somehow equates that with obsessing over your every move.) So what, it’s your mom and you love her, so get her something awesome, or she will never forget it, and you will feel the burn on your next birthday. Just kidding, she would never do that. Tip: do your shopping at a Halloween-themed store. Here are some ideas she will adore…

  • Anything blood-red, maroon, or black
  • Anything spider-themed
  • A new cloak
  • A zip drive with all of your passwords

For real, though, this devoted mom will appreciate any of these:



If you have a Sagittarian mom, you probably attended your first protest march before you could walk. Your earliest drawings were on poster board signs for these marches. Travel is also important to this sign, though it’s more "Peace Corp." and less "Cancun." These social justice warriors aren’t all that materialistic, which makes them difficult to shop for. Unless it’s fair trade, with the proceeds going to an animal rescue fund, don’t even bother, or you’ll get a lecture about sweatshops and sustainability, you will roll your eyes, and there goes your day. Instead, give her something she will sincerely appreciate:

  • A puppy
  • Volunteer with her at a shelter
  • Tom’s shoes

Your Archer mom will also love:


mom and daughter laughing



Fortunately, Capricorn moms have great sense of humor. Unfortunately, it’s buried deep beneath a crust of workaholism, under sedimentary layers of ambition and self-denial. Truth be told, she likes herself just as she is. She likes you just as you are too, so don’t give her a hard time about “needing to pamper herself” because it’s never going to happen. Instead, consider giving her…

  • A subscription to Barrons
  • A new high-precision calculator
  • Shoe inserts

Earth sign Capricorns appreciate rich flavors and aromas, so consider something like this…

  • Lucky Morning Spice tea; smooth Darjeeling flavor is enhanced but not drowned out by aromatic spices
  • Peach Apricot black tea is smooth and sweetly satisfying
  • Capricorn mama will love the simple and pleasing design of these ceramic tea pots with their precision-machined fine infuser and smooth matte finish



If your mom drove a Volvo, ran for office, helped you start an insect collection, and chose not to get you vaccinated, chances are she is an Aquarius. And that means, good luck shopping for her, because this sign has a markedly weird relationship with the physical world. An Aquarius might forget to eat for days on end, but spend an entire paycheck on Star Trek merchandise. You just can’t figure some people out. But since it’s Mother’s Day, consider these ideas…

  • A week at Space Camp
  • A CSA subscription
  • Birkenstocks
  • Comicon passes

If your air sign mama likes natural stuff like tea, she will love these options:

  • Lady Ginger tea, with a unique flavor and uplifting aroma
  • Cranberry Apple Tart is just plain fun, and also supports circulation, which is ruled by Aquarius
  • The unique color and flavor of Ultra Violet tea will appeal to her love of all things interesting, simple, and yummy


mom and child hugging



The Pisces mother is the embodiment of selfless love, escapism, and mediumship. She has a dreamy nature and is easily distracted, so loudly clap your hands a few times to get her attention. Once all eyes are on you, give her a bear hug, at which point she will probably start to cry, because Pisces are so dang emotional. Don’t bother getting her a deck of tarot cards, because she already knows what’s going to happen. Do…

  • Get your aura photos taken together
  • Sign her up for crafting classes
  • Buy her anything with a mermaid on it (mermaids are her spirit animal, in case you didn’t know)

Pisces moms will also love:


No matter what sign your mother is, she is amazing and deserves the happiest Mother’s Day ever!




~Kita, Gemini, daughter of a Libra

mom and baby




1 Response


May 06, 2018

I have the Moroccan rose oil. So pretty. Skip the napkin rings and go down to diamonds. Soooo kidding wouldn’t relinquish my rose oil for all the diamonds in the coal..,..💞😊

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